New vs. Traditional

So, as I sat in my University’s café, I overheard a conversation…

Attractive Womyn: You’re so cute; Attractive Man: Thank you (blushing); AW: You should let me buy you a coffee or something; AM: No thank you, I already had some (continues blushing)…

The convo continued on with small talk and with the guy eventually turning her down because he had a girlfriend. This womyn clearly liked what she saw and was going in for the kill. I know some womyn still believe in the “traditional” rules of dating (if a man doesn’t approach me, it’s a lost cause), but I love when I see womyn take initiative. We’re only getting older, why NOT take the initiative?

In this day and age, womyn have become independent in every aspect. We work, take care of our children, take care of our houses, attend school, pay bills, etc. So, why can’t we be independent in the dating world? Men are increasingly becoming more afraid of rejection. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard from friends, “He was staring at me the whole night but didn’t say anything!” I’ve said that a couple of times before too.

Men are expecting us to be more straightforward nowadays and I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that. This is not going to say that womyn should be straightforward ALL THE TIME. A man who is confident enough to step to a womyn correctly, never gets old. Also, if internet dating is your thing, so be it! Going out to meet men or being optimistic about meeting men during social events does get old. Do what makes you comfortable but be aware of the dangers.

Don’t get me wrong, I still do believe in some “traditional” rules. Men should always be chivalrous. A man who isn’t polite is a boy. Also, if the man initiated the date, I think it is right for him to pay the bill. With that said, when dating becomes more frequent with the same man, or becomes more than “dating,” there’s nothing wrong with going dutch. Womyn can and should pick up the bill sometimes.

We’re all in the search for our “soul mates,” right? Why not take some control of the search?


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